Where was the Warning?

There’s something magical about this show that just latches on and won’t leave me be, forcing me to write out the thoughts that ruminate in my brain again and again and again.

During the show last night, I thought about what I wanted to write next.  There are so many aspects that I could spend hours either talking about or writing about, and I had to pick one. (There’s plenty of time, don’t worry I’m sure I’ll write about everything.)

One thing I like about this show is how it constantly challenges me.  Fifteen body mics are a lot to juggle, especially during the scenes with everyone on stage.  And it takes a lot for me to make sure everyone sounds good, no one feedsback, and that no one over powers the others.  And of course, catching all my cues without getting backstage noise is important too.

And now… onto what I actually was going to write about.

When I was 17, I was visiting a school in New York with my mom, we were in a cuban restaurant, my mom ordered a pitcher of sangrias, and let me had some.  A great idea to get your underaged kid a bit tipsy before telling her that you’ve known she was gay since she was like 7, and that you’re okay with it.  Of course, I choked a little bit.  I thought I had hid it better! (Of course I knew I really hadn’t, but I liked to pretend.)

If only most people had this kind of positive experience letting their parents in on what is for most a terrifying secret to carry around.

And here comes the ‘bare’ tie in-

Peter tries desperately to tell his mom about his feelings for Jason, but during their conversation, she doesn’t want to hear it, she doesn’t want to let him break the secret open.  He goes away from the conversation feeling dejected, rejected, but he couldn’t really be further from the truth.

Claire knew her son, she’s always known him, known everything about him, whether she wanted to accept it and make it a part of her public reality or not .  Most parents who pay attention, know this secret about their kid.  They may react positively or negatively, but deep down, they know.  Claire loves Peter, she loves him for who he is, no matter who that is.  Her only hesitation is how everyone else will see her, she doesn’t “want their pity, I just want my son.”  She’s a good mother, she just wasn’t ready to deal with the reality of having a gay son, though she’s had a gay son since he was born.  She just has to own up to it now.

My mother told me that she saw her therapist after she could no longer deny who I was, she told him, “I don’t know how to parent a gay child.”  Her therapist said, “It seems to me that you’ve been doing it for 18 years.”  I was still the same person who she’d given birth to, I was still the same kid she’d raised, nothing intrinsic about who I was had changed.  Looking at it that way gave my mom a sense of peace.  Nothing had changed, and yet everything had.

Claire realizes this at the same time my mom did.  Peter is still Peter, he’s just not lying about anything anymore.  And Claire loves him just as much as she had before.

 

Like I said, if only more people had such reactions to their coming out.

 

It does get better.

Spring’- Featuring Charlotte Byrd as Nadia.

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